About

I survived being married to and having children with a Narcissistic Sociopath.  I am not a therapist and having no training in the field of psychology but in my opinion and from my extensive research I believe my ex-husband is an undiagnosed sociopath with a narcissistic personality disorder.  We were married for 10 ½ years and together for a total of 13 years.  We definitely had problems from the beginning and by the end of the first year I was beginning to feel as though I had made a terrible mistake.  But there were several things that always brought me back.  First, I had known my ex since junior high, we grew up together, had the same group of friends, even dated for a short period of time in high school.  To everyone in our circle of friends we had this amazing and beautiful love story of a childhood together, going our separate ways then reuniting and falling madly in love.  However from the beginning Bruce’s lying and cheating were a problem.  Why stay with, marry and then have children with someone like this?  Anyone in the world of psychology will tell you that Narcissists are attracted to strong, competent, self-sufficient women with a strong sense of responsibility and moral fiber.  The more self-sufficient and confident a woman is the more determined the narcissist will be to “break her”; if he can make her totally dependent on him it is the ultimate satisfaction for him.

I have been divorced for one year and separated for 2.  I started this blog as a resource for other women dealing with the emotional abuse and hell that comes with being with a narcissist or sociopath.  Unfortunately my ex is a member of local law enforcement so filing police reports or getting the courts to acknowledge abusive behavior is very difficult.

I hope you find this blog and accompanying resources helpful.  It is my hope that all who have experienced this abuse will feel a little less alone, more educated about Sociopaths and NPDs and feel a little less frustrated.

6 thoughts on “About

  1. Separated 5 years, divorced for 2. Its creepy how similar our experiences are. I can totally relate to you, right down to the stalking behaviours.

    By coincidence, my new boss knows my ex, our kids go to the same school. The ex went so far as to corner my boss’ husband at a school event to ask him about me. My boss was not fully aware of my situation but this made her very scared for my safety.

    I am 40 years old and I have a network of people checking up on me daily and somebody knows where I am at all times. If I dont reply to texts or phone calls within a half an hour, they call police. I feel like a smothered 16 year old with uber-strict parents but I have no choice. It’s for my own safety.

    It sounds horrible but its comforting to know I’m not alone in the battle and there really isn’t something ‘wrong with me’. Keep your head up and know that your posts are being heard and I look forward to reading more. I’m here to listen too if you need an anonymous ear.

  2. I’ve nominated you for the Brave Heart Award: http://wp.me/p3UZPT-qt

    Stand Strong You Are Not Alone

    I call you a survivor, because that is what you are. There are days when you don’t feel like a survivor and there are days when the memories trigger your past and it feels like you are losing the fight – but you are not. Take the past and heal with it. You are strong. I want you to know that the abuse was not your fault. It does not matter what age it happened. You did not deserve it, you did not cause it, and you did not bring it on yourself. You own no shame, guilt, or remorse. In your life, you have faced many demons but look around you and you will see there is hope, and there is beauty. You are beautiful, You are loved, there is hope. You deserve to be loved and treated with respect. You deserve peace and joy in your life. Don’t settle for anything less than that. God has plans for you. Your future does not have to be dictated by your past.

    Each step you take you are not alone.

    Stand Strong.

  3. I had to run away to a different continent to get away from mine. New city. No support system. 3 young children. it’s hell.

  4. So glad to have found this blog. My husbands’ ex-wife is our narcissist. I read that you started the blog for other women that have been abused by a narcissist but please believe me – this abuse can happen to men as well. I look forward to reading and sharing on more of your blogs.

  5. I am going on year 29 with my N husband. I only figured out “who” he was around 2007. I have started counseling to try and figure out what to do.
    Do they ever change?

  6. Wow I read this and hear me all over, I escaped one twelve years ago and after him only two years later fell in love with another and it feels almost linear repeat just a different set of circumstances. I will stay single not worth the pain, from the first one I am raising a beautiful daughter and hope she does not ever have to live this way. Would love to hear more and even write a book is anyone interested in an interview? God bless you all such a complex situation

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